There seems to be a magic rule for how long you should wait before asking for another date. Waiting too long will make it look like you don’t care, and calling to soon will make you seem desperate. If you are confused and need to know how long is appropriate to wait, here’s what you should know.

After The First Date

The time frame after the first date is the most important. You don’t want them to think you aren’t interested, and you don’t want to seem too needy. Waiting three days seems to be the perfect balance. It’s appropriate to call after the date to make sure they got home safely, but after that give it three days before you call for another date.

After The Second Date

After the second date it’s appropriate to speed up the time frame. You can mention if you have tickets to an upcoming event towards the end of the evening. If you don’t already have something planned, you could call them a day or two after the date to invite them on another one.


Always call for the first few dates. Email can be good later, but this early on it comes across as impersonal. It’s appropriate to leave a message, then call back to follow up a few days later. If after that you haven’t heard back, just assume you won’t and move on. Never call incessantly to ask for a date. If something had come up and they genuinely weren’t able to return your call, you will probably never hear back if you have called 100 times or left numerous messages on their machine. It’s also good etiquette to return a call to decline a date if someone has called you. While it’s easier to just ignore the call, it puts the other person in a bad position.